Joke 3

A man is doing yardwork when he falls off his ladder and breaks both legs. His wife hears the crash and comes running. She finds her husband lying paralyzed on the lawn. He motions for her to come near him. "I want you to feel my pain," he says. He places her hands on his broken legs. Then, in a flash, he draws a switchblade from his pocket and slices her arm. "Now do you feel it?!" he yells. The wife begins sobbing. The husband says: "You always said you wanted a tendon bracelet!"